What is Mindfulness?
Mindfulness is an awareness of the present moment in a curious and non-judgmental way.
I liken mindfulness to self-awareness. Being mindful helps us to cultivate an awareness to our inner and outer world by inviting a self-exploration of the present moment.
The present is multi-faceted and we can be present both with our internal experience, as well as our external experience.
Being present externally involves using our senses to connect ourselves into the moment. Part of being human is to get caught up in our thoughts, to lean towards living more in our head, than in our body. However, being in our mind can pull us out of the present, as our mind likes to focus on the past and the future. By using our senses we come back into our body, to the experiences which are happening right now, in this moment.
For example, when washing the dishes, instead of our mind racing with our to-do list, we can bring our attention to our bodily senses: to the feel of the water, the sound of the water and clinking dishes, the sight of the soap suds, etc.
We can also turn our attention inward, which involves a reflection of our internal experience. It's bringing awareness to our emotions, our thoughts, and our physical sensations. It’s taking a moment to pause and asking ourselves the questions, “What am I noticing in my body right now?” “What emotions may be present and how are they expressed in my body?”
Internal mindfulness is very often done through formal meditation, where we set aside dedicated time to connect to our internal experience.
Let’s be honest here, being mindful is really hard. Many of our lives are ridiculously busy, and we’re pretty much hard-wired to be stuck in our heads. The last thing I want is for someone to not practice mindfulness because it feels overwhelming. I would instead invite someone to pick an aspect of mindfulness that feels more relatable and achievable and start there.
Some starting questions you can ask yourself are:
How do I feel about a formal meditation practice?
How do I feel about informally practicing mindfulness during a task?
Which activities would I like to perform more mindfully?
Would I like to practice mindfulness with myself or in the context of a relationship?
I generally recommend picking one aspect of mindfulness to start with, and starting your practice for only a few minutes at a time. The good news is that mindfulness is like a muscle, and the more we practice it, the more natural it can feel.